Soy flour is not good for frying. My last kitchen experiment proved this to be true. If I'd read a little about soy flour I would have saved myself some time and frustration. I don't like to fail when I cook. So after my disappointing "Soy experiment" I decided to bake up about 5 dozen chocolate chip cookies. They turned out just as I expected. Excellent!
I want to prepare savory food, but I always end up with the sweets. The holidays are approaching and I've been dusting off my favorite recipes. Banana Nut Bread, Chocolate Chip cookies with walnuts, sweet potato bread and pies. Next week's experiment will be another savory one. You have to be careful when you experiment with food. You have to eat your mistakes. Food is too expensive for all of that!
Thanksgiving will be in town for me this year. I have to work the day after so I am not straying to far from home base. It won't be at my house, but I will cook. Oh and will I cook! I actually feel excited about it. I have a cornbread recipe that will be wonderful for the stuffing, and I can do a great squash casserole. All within my plan to eat like I've got some sense.
I love the fall. The time of harvest. It makes me think of abundance. Even in these tough economic times. I am blessed to be able to put food on my table and socks on my children's feet. (Because we are not turning on that darn heat. I don't work for Duke Energy or whatever they are called now.) I bake when the weather gets cool. The heat is a comfort and the smells of cinnamon, sugar and butter fill the house. My daughters help me cook and bake. It is a time to create wonderful memories to last a lifetime.
I weighed today, but I couldn't read the scale. I don't know what the point of that exercise was. The scale was broken and the place I normally go to weigh was closed. I want to weigh on the same scale week after week. I want to trust that one scale will keep the other scales from lying to me. I think I lost weight, but I'm not sure. Since I feel like, I will believe it until that lying contraption tells me otherwise. I said that I would purchase a scale for at home use once I got down to 350. I ain't there yet. So for now I'll head to the "office" and weigh on Thursdays. I will try on the jeans tonight and see what progress we are making. When I am able to get those jokers on, it will be a whole new ball game! As a matter of fact the scream of utter satisfaction should be heard around the world!
More to come...
About Me
Friday, October 31, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
Grief doesn't help keep the weight off.
I'm still fat. The only thing is that is weigh more than I did two weeks ago. I've had to recommit to myself to stay on track. I've gained like 8 lbs in the past 2 weeks. I'm sad about it. I want to be sick about it, but I can't. It's not like I was forced to eat bad things. Most of it is from being dehydrated. I haven't been drinking enough water. That has got to change. It is changing.
I went for my weekly weigh and measure and still lost some inches. That is what keeps me going. I was on a streak for a while and was posting weight loss every week. Two and a half weeks ago my friend passed suddenly and it's been surreal ever since. I miss being told, "You look good baby!" and "Keep it up. You'll be skinny before you know it." It is a good thing I can still hear his voice in my head. I miss my Cliff.
My saving grace right now is the "One." He has been extremely understanding and has worked very hard to bust me out of the shell I like to build around myself when I am unhappy. I'm still sad, but only because I'm selfish. Then I am thankful for the many blessings that abound within my life and I move on.
I'm drinking my water. I'm eating my fresh food. I'm going to get into those jeans in my closet! I have clothes in my closet that I refuse to give away because I am determined to get into them. I've started parking at the back of the parking lot and moving with purpose when I walk. When the sun is shining or if it's cold and raining, I tell myself that those that are not with me are in the wind.
Excuse me while I drink this water...
I went for my weekly weigh and measure and still lost some inches. That is what keeps me going. I was on a streak for a while and was posting weight loss every week. Two and a half weeks ago my friend passed suddenly and it's been surreal ever since. I miss being told, "You look good baby!" and "Keep it up. You'll be skinny before you know it." It is a good thing I can still hear his voice in my head. I miss my Cliff.
My saving grace right now is the "One." He has been extremely understanding and has worked very hard to bust me out of the shell I like to build around myself when I am unhappy. I'm still sad, but only because I'm selfish. Then I am thankful for the many blessings that abound within my life and I move on.
I'm drinking my water. I'm eating my fresh food. I'm going to get into those jeans in my closet! I have clothes in my closet that I refuse to give away because I am determined to get into them. I've started parking at the back of the parking lot and moving with purpose when I walk. When the sun is shining or if it's cold and raining, I tell myself that those that are not with me are in the wind.
Excuse me while I drink this water...
Where are the Spoons?! ~Small kitchen rant.
I love setting a table. There is something that I feel validates me as a woman in it. Sitting around a table with family eating from "real" dishes and using spoons, forks and knives. I'd gotten away from that practice and have recently been working on doing the things that make me happy.
I once had a service for 4 of dishes and a set of "silver" that matched to go along with it. We would set out the place mats, napkins, plates, put the food in the middle, sit in chairs and eat together with the television off. It was great!
Life has really been happening to me in the past 5 years and that practice fell by the way. In that time also, the Gremlins have discovered that my spoons are tasty. When my family started to grow, we invested in expanding the silver to a service for 20 or so. Now, when we wash all the dishes, utensils and the like, I can look in the drawer and see 4 spoons! What!? There are 20 forks, 25 butter knives and 4 spoons!
My mother, God bless her, gave us 8 spoons recently and now we are down to 8 spoons. *sigh* I counted.
I don't know what is happening to them. They are the most used utensil in the house, having 2 toddlers eating everything with a spoon. I really think that they are throwing them in the trash on their way to put their dishes in the sink. I'm not missing any dishes though.
Seven years ago, before moving closer to family, I used to clean the kitchen at night. I would tuck in my little girls and then tackle my kitchen. I remember it vividly, more so than any kitchen I've ever had. It was a cubbie hole. I would have to leave the kitchen if anyone, even one of my little girls, wanted something out of the kitchen. There was no counter space and I recall the dishwasher and oven couldn't be opened at the same time because they were very close together. Some nights I would talk on the phone to my mother who would complain about the noise I was making with the dishes. I would scrub the stove top and clean out under the eyes. I mopped and wiped down the cabinet doors. The kitchen was always a 10 minute job, but I would take about an hour. I made sure that everything was clean. I would take great satisfaction in looking into that little shoe box of a space and thinking, "All clean."
Now? I want to know where my spoons are! In the grand scheme of things, I can say that my worries are few. I still want to know where my spoons are. They didn't run away with the dishes. The dishes are still here. At least those that have not fallen victim to butter fingered adolescents and gravity. Maybe they ran away, distraught over the loss of the lovely dishes. Knowing that they will never be together again.
If you're ever out and happen to see the odd miscellaneous spoon. Tell it that it is missed. We have new dishes for it to meet.
I once had a service for 4 of dishes and a set of "silver" that matched to go along with it. We would set out the place mats, napkins, plates, put the food in the middle, sit in chairs and eat together with the television off. It was great!
Life has really been happening to me in the past 5 years and that practice fell by the way. In that time also, the Gremlins have discovered that my spoons are tasty. When my family started to grow, we invested in expanding the silver to a service for 20 or so. Now, when we wash all the dishes, utensils and the like, I can look in the drawer and see 4 spoons! What!? There are 20 forks, 25 butter knives and 4 spoons!
My mother, God bless her, gave us 8 spoons recently and now we are down to 8 spoons. *sigh* I counted.
I don't know what is happening to them. They are the most used utensil in the house, having 2 toddlers eating everything with a spoon. I really think that they are throwing them in the trash on their way to put their dishes in the sink. I'm not missing any dishes though.
Seven years ago, before moving closer to family, I used to clean the kitchen at night. I would tuck in my little girls and then tackle my kitchen. I remember it vividly, more so than any kitchen I've ever had. It was a cubbie hole. I would have to leave the kitchen if anyone, even one of my little girls, wanted something out of the kitchen. There was no counter space and I recall the dishwasher and oven couldn't be opened at the same time because they were very close together. Some nights I would talk on the phone to my mother who would complain about the noise I was making with the dishes. I would scrub the stove top and clean out under the eyes. I mopped and wiped down the cabinet doors. The kitchen was always a 10 minute job, but I would take about an hour. I made sure that everything was clean. I would take great satisfaction in looking into that little shoe box of a space and thinking, "All clean."
Now? I want to know where my spoons are! In the grand scheme of things, I can say that my worries are few. I still want to know where my spoons are. They didn't run away with the dishes. The dishes are still here. At least those that have not fallen victim to butter fingered adolescents and gravity. Maybe they ran away, distraught over the loss of the lovely dishes. Knowing that they will never be together again.
If you're ever out and happen to see the odd miscellaneous spoon. Tell it that it is missed. We have new dishes for it to meet.
Friday, October 17, 2008
On the path, views from the road to my ideal size.
I have been fat for at least 23 years. I remember being teased about my weight when I was small and looking back at the pictures, I was not fat! I was a john brown child for Pete's sake.
I am now a grown woman with 4 children and type 2 diabetes. I have been diabetic for nearly 9 years now. The diagnosis was a shock for me as it came on my birthday of all days. I ended up staying in the hospital for a couple of days and really feeling like my head was swimming from everything that was thrown at me in that time and feeling like I was just set free to figure it out all on my own. Have I? I'm still fat and diabetic, but I'm making some major headway.
Now I've always felt that you can eat your way past many physical maladies. Have a headache? Drink some water. In a bad mood, have some chocolate. Of course this theory assumes that one is capable of moderation. I lacked this very important trait for a very long time. Now? I'm getting it together.
At one time in the past 2 years, I weighed about 459. I weighed that much while pregnant with my second son, but gained that weight right back after he was born! I was so depressed and was about to just give up on myself. I didn't. I was complaining to my sister one day about how unhappy I was about my weight. She said that I know what I need to do to fix it, I just needed to do it. She was right. I do know. Doing it was the problem. I was convinced that I would have to lead a life of deprivation from tasty food and I would be hungry all the time. I was wrong.
About two months ago one of my friends came to stay with me for a little while. He'd lost about 60 lbs and I wanted to know how he did it. I asked him to tell me and he said. "Eat like you have some sense." I thought I was doing that and had lost some weight, but I wanted results like he had. When I got him to tell me specifically what he was doing, I balked. Fresh food? Nothing processed? Vegetables and fruit and fruit juice were the order of the day. NO BREAD?!? Come on! This was starting to sound like my fears realized. I was going to be fat the rest of my life!
I decided to check my attitude at the door and listen. I wanted to get my system cleaned out and my friend recommended a juice fast. As a diabetic, fasting is a bad idea. Juice was another one because of all the sugar in it. So I started thinking about other ways to clean my system out. I decided that I would look into having my colon cleansed. I found a wonderful colon hydro therapist in my city and made an appointment. I read a lot online about the pros and cons of colonics and decided that the pros would get me headed in the right direction. I will spare you the unpleasant details, but I am pleased with the results. I'd been keeping a food diary in the hopes of having someone look at it to give me some more direction about what I was doing right and what I was doing wrong. A month ago I had someone do that for me. Do you know what she told me? "You're eating too many carbohydrates. A lot of bread. It is keeping you from meeting your goals."
DAG NABBIT! (yeah, I'm from the South)
My friend was right so I had to go home with a fork in hand to eat a huge plate of crow. Bye Bye Bread. I have not looked back. Bread isn't completely gone, but three slices in a week is much less than my average four to five slices a day. I'm down to 390 now and still headed in the right direction. Fresh fruit and vegetables are on the menu now. We LOVE the farmer's market. I can get the food I like and find something new to try. Spaghetti Squash has replaced "real" spaghetti in my house. The meat sauce is creative and varied. Chunky with tomatoes, green peppers, onions, zucchini and ground meat.
I have committed myself to losing 10lbs a month. A very reasonable goal considering the actual amount of weight I have to lose overall. I have not added exercise other than walking right now. I will write once a month about my experience and hope that it helps others.
Stay tuned.....More to come!
Coley.
I am now a grown woman with 4 children and type 2 diabetes. I have been diabetic for nearly 9 years now. The diagnosis was a shock for me as it came on my birthday of all days. I ended up staying in the hospital for a couple of days and really feeling like my head was swimming from everything that was thrown at me in that time and feeling like I was just set free to figure it out all on my own. Have I? I'm still fat and diabetic, but I'm making some major headway.
Now I've always felt that you can eat your way past many physical maladies. Have a headache? Drink some water. In a bad mood, have some chocolate. Of course this theory assumes that one is capable of moderation. I lacked this very important trait for a very long time. Now? I'm getting it together.
At one time in the past 2 years, I weighed about 459. I weighed that much while pregnant with my second son, but gained that weight right back after he was born! I was so depressed and was about to just give up on myself. I didn't. I was complaining to my sister one day about how unhappy I was about my weight. She said that I know what I need to do to fix it, I just needed to do it. She was right. I do know. Doing it was the problem. I was convinced that I would have to lead a life of deprivation from tasty food and I would be hungry all the time. I was wrong.
About two months ago one of my friends came to stay with me for a little while. He'd lost about 60 lbs and I wanted to know how he did it. I asked him to tell me and he said. "Eat like you have some sense." I thought I was doing that and had lost some weight, but I wanted results like he had. When I got him to tell me specifically what he was doing, I balked. Fresh food? Nothing processed? Vegetables and fruit and fruit juice were the order of the day. NO BREAD?!? Come on! This was starting to sound like my fears realized. I was going to be fat the rest of my life!
I decided to check my attitude at the door and listen. I wanted to get my system cleaned out and my friend recommended a juice fast. As a diabetic, fasting is a bad idea. Juice was another one because of all the sugar in it. So I started thinking about other ways to clean my system out. I decided that I would look into having my colon cleansed. I found a wonderful colon hydro therapist in my city and made an appointment. I read a lot online about the pros and cons of colonics and decided that the pros would get me headed in the right direction. I will spare you the unpleasant details, but I am pleased with the results. I'd been keeping a food diary in the hopes of having someone look at it to give me some more direction about what I was doing right and what I was doing wrong. A month ago I had someone do that for me. Do you know what she told me? "You're eating too many carbohydrates. A lot of bread. It is keeping you from meeting your goals."
DAG NABBIT! (yeah, I'm from the South)
My friend was right so I had to go home with a fork in hand to eat a huge plate of crow. Bye Bye Bread. I have not looked back. Bread isn't completely gone, but three slices in a week is much less than my average four to five slices a day. I'm down to 390 now and still headed in the right direction. Fresh fruit and vegetables are on the menu now. We LOVE the farmer's market. I can get the food I like and find something new to try. Spaghetti Squash has replaced "real" spaghetti in my house. The meat sauce is creative and varied. Chunky with tomatoes, green peppers, onions, zucchini and ground meat.
I have committed myself to losing 10lbs a month. A very reasonable goal considering the actual amount of weight I have to lose overall. I have not added exercise other than walking right now. I will write once a month about my experience and hope that it helps others.
Stay tuned.....More to come!
Coley.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Thoughts on life and death
Ever since my grandfather passed away when I was eight years old, I've associated food with memories of loved ones. I didn't understand much back then. I was rather sheltered and didn't know much about what was going on. I remember a lot of family together and a lot of food.
I grew up in a big family so we cooked a lot. I remember cooking with my father as a very young person. The holiday season was a busy one. My father backed pies, my sister baked cakes and I was a little helper. I grabbed all manner of needed tools and was rewarded with a chance to hold the mixer or a taste of the treats that were being created.
When my father passed away in 2003 I wanted to create those memories of baking and preparing food with my children. I went to one of my favorite recipe sites and found a recipe for banana nut bread. I rounded up the ingredients and my daughters and together we made 2 loaves of banana nut bread. A Coley family tradition was born. We've made cakes, cookies, cup cakes, banana bread, sweet potato bread, pecan pies, empenadas and all manner of baked sweets. In those times we are laughing and I have shared stories with them about their grandfather, grandmother, aunts and uncles. The prepared food is then shared with friends and family. I have come to use the preparation of food as a means of coping with change, loss and sadness.
A dear friend, Superman, passed away this week. It was sudden and I still can't believe it. His real name was Cliff. It was no secret that he was a "Super" Man. It's funny how we see someone everyday and become so accustomed to their presence and when it suddenly isn't there anymore, it hurts. He taught me how to play at work. He made it easy to go to work when I didn't really want to and hard not to go to work when I couldn't. He is a light that will shine on in the lives of those he touched. He was always so busy, but never too busy for me. I thank God for the chance to have him be in my life for the time he was. He always had a smile for me so I traded him one of mine. He made a choice to be happy and to choose his attitude everyday. I want to do that too. As I prepare to say my final goodbye, I will choose to be happy that I knew him rather than sad that he's gone.
I grew up in a big family so we cooked a lot. I remember cooking with my father as a very young person. The holiday season was a busy one. My father backed pies, my sister baked cakes and I was a little helper. I grabbed all manner of needed tools and was rewarded with a chance to hold the mixer or a taste of the treats that were being created.
When my father passed away in 2003 I wanted to create those memories of baking and preparing food with my children. I went to one of my favorite recipe sites and found a recipe for banana nut bread. I rounded up the ingredients and my daughters and together we made 2 loaves of banana nut bread. A Coley family tradition was born. We've made cakes, cookies, cup cakes, banana bread, sweet potato bread, pecan pies, empenadas and all manner of baked sweets. In those times we are laughing and I have shared stories with them about their grandfather, grandmother, aunts and uncles. The prepared food is then shared with friends and family. I have come to use the preparation of food as a means of coping with change, loss and sadness.
A dear friend, Superman, passed away this week. It was sudden and I still can't believe it. His real name was Cliff. It was no secret that he was a "Super" Man. It's funny how we see someone everyday and become so accustomed to their presence and when it suddenly isn't there anymore, it hurts. He taught me how to play at work. He made it easy to go to work when I didn't really want to and hard not to go to work when I couldn't. He is a light that will shine on in the lives of those he touched. He was always so busy, but never too busy for me. I thank God for the chance to have him be in my life for the time he was. He always had a smile for me so I traded him one of mine. He made a choice to be happy and to choose his attitude everyday. I want to do that too. As I prepare to say my final goodbye, I will choose to be happy that I knew him rather than sad that he's gone.
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